A Tribute to the “Blokiest Blokes Car”: My Austin Healey 3000
American muscle, the testoserone filled words reflect these cumbersome cars very well. There is another option: a “sexy as hell” proper open top British roadster.
In the sixties, they were a cheap (3000 quid) option for sports car purists who craved the total driving experience. Before the British Leyland clustermuck, MGs and Triumphs were unrivaled sports cars in their class, but the Healey was the doting older brother who picks on his little siblings, and also defended them against the big “American V-8s.” it was a time when you’d take your “special lady” for a spin in the Healey, then drop her off, get under the bonnet and “fiddle with the niggly bits.” Then you’re off to the track to do battle with anything from Ferraris to Aston Martins (the Healeys could take the 250 Ferrari’s on the right track). The Brits prided themselves on affordable performance. When my dad would take the Healey to car shows, we’d often be the only Austin, perhaps even the only British car registered. Oh, and how the guys would laugh at us with their big displacement Fords and GMs.The sad fact was they were almost always reduced to taking a picture of our car on the behest of their wife, and the constant line “you should of bought that one.” Healeys are not for everyone, but girls love them and that straight six gives us men something to hang our hat on.
With the recent reemergence of the Healey on the streets, I’ve decided to give you my perspective. I step into the garage and am greeted by a “proper British sports car,” a hairy chested Healey 3000. The sweeping curves take you back to a time when open top motoring was romantic and the cast iron straight six shows you why the Brits held London with spitfires and fighterplanes made from balsa wood (DH Mosquito).
So you turn it on, and the straight six roars to life singing through the straight pipes. Her lead fuel exhaust note letting the neighborhood know Union Jack is not forgotten, she’s awakened. As soon as you sit in the driver’s seat you feel Winston Churchill curl up nicely inside your testicles, margaret thatcher beating down the iron curtain of communism in your chest, and blokes in pubs singing proper songs about King and Country, oh yeah! Slam that stick in reverse and back it out. fuel pump ticking loudly and the sweet smell of gasoline rising from behind me. “Double Clutch, downshift and give her hell.”
The car always speaks for itself. Before i get anywhere, they want to know: How the hell did i get this car? My old man, that’s how. His pride and joy, the love of his life. He often joked the Healey will never start if you need to go out on a date, but when it does, you’d better marry that girl. The same is true with all British sports cars. They all have a mind of their own and are wildly jealous. If you drive a British sports car and don’t have a girlfriend, there’s something wrong. The whole idea is to take that “special lady” on a ride she’ll never forget. I refer to the BMC ads of the sixties as evidence.
For me, working on this car is far better than driving it. There’s no debate. If you wanna turn your beta-male into an alpha: get him a Healey!
He’ll be smoking dunhills and drinking scotch in no time. When you drive it, you get this attitude. My dad said it put him in his 20s. For me, like i said, “Winston Churchill kicking Neville Chamberlain’s ass” in your testicles. How manlier does it get? Rain, that’s how much. The Brits got it right. A real bloke has no need for a roof because when you’re moving you don’t get wet. So if you see me in the pouring rain smoking a cigarette, whizzing by in this british classic, know this … for that moment in time I am manlier than you can ever hope to imagine.
Thanks dad. Your love of Brits and their cars lives strong in me, and apparently so does Churchill.
By David Prado
'Beta-Male Cure' have 10 comments
May 17, 2012 @ 1:32 pm Samuel Prado Franquiz
Me gusto
May 17, 2012 @ 4:03 pm Eddy
Humorous and touching, bro.
May 17, 2012 @ 8:13 pm Andy
This is an awesome article. Keep up the great work. The Healey is an awesome car.
May 18, 2012 @ 2:34 pm Cary Gardner
My ‘first love’ drove a 1962 AH3000. She turned me on…to British cars! I thank you.
May 30, 2012 @ 10:57 am Frederick Smith Jr.
Had classics my whole life..my 67 AH 3000 was the most loved..loved your article..thanks.
May 30, 2012 @ 1:47 pm Trevor Janz
My dad bought a 1967 3000 MkIII in 1976. I was 7 years old. He promised to never sell it…that it would be mine some day and told me never to sell it.
Well, tragically my father died unexpectadly in 1993….I was 24 years old…wife, two kids…and became the cartaker of the car my dad loved more than life itself. With a litte TLC here and there…engine overhaul last year I have kept it on the road. My father would say, “keep it on the road and drive it hard…really hard….don’t baby it….the more you drive it the better it will run”. He was right.
Many great memories of my dad and the Healey.
Thanks Dad!
Trevor
Oshkosh, Wisconsin
June 1, 2012 @ 10:46 pm Frank
Great article! Bought my pride and joy (1960 AH 3000 2 seater) in 1968, its 3rd owner. Met lots of folks who had one but had to sell it. Never crossed my mind to sell mine! Will pass it on to my gear head (and Dr.) son and just maybe, to my grandson (he’s 4 and very into anything with wheels).
June 2, 2012 @ 7:21 pm greg
great article…sums up the Healey lifestyle and attitude in short order!
a tired 1960 BT-7 was my first ride at age 16, and after a long gap in years, another brutish 1960 BT-7 is back in my life, and will be there with me till the end…
June 7, 2012 @ 6:59 pm Ron, Dartmouth, Nova Scotia
A super story. As a young naval officer fifty years ago, I was driving an MGA when I went on a blind date with the girl who would eventually consent to be my wife. At the time I was setting funds aside so I could trade up to a Healey, but it wasn’t long before I spent that money on a diamond engagement ring. After the wedding, our first visit to the supermarket forced the sad realization that a two-seater sports car was great for courting a young lady, but it was not so practical for the day-to-day transportation needs of married and family life. So I sold the MGA and for several years afterwards I mourned the missed opportunity of owning a Healey, eventually putting aside all thoughts of roaring down the back roads of Nova Scotia with the wind in my face. Then suddenly an old sports car buddy directed my attention to a Healey for sale, and the old desire flared up stronger than ever. This was around the time we celebrated our twentieth wedding anniversary, and one day my darling wife surprised me by saying “I think you should get your Healey”. This sparked a continent-wide search for a BJ8, and eventually I tracked one down in British Columbia. My summer vacation that year was spent driving the Healey from the west coast to the east coast, with the top down all the way. That was nearly thirty years ago, and as we approach our fiftieth anniversary, the Healey is still our ride of choice when we just want to head out for a pleasant spin. So now I own the sports car of my dreams, with the girl of my dreams still occupying the passenger seat…
November 16, 2012 @ 5:25 pm PAUL BUSH
REVERSE THE COLOR & THIS IS MY CAR . BOUGHT IN 1962 NEW BN7 WENT TO WORK & THIS YOUNG LADY LIKED IT & WANTED A RIDE . NOW 50 YEARS & 3 BOYS LATER WE STILL GO FOR A RIDE.