Club Corner Pt 2, A Continuing Series

From Moss Motoring 1985

BY LAWRIE ALEXANDER

Last time we talked about forming your local club. You did that (well done!), but now you’re looking for something to do with all your new found club-mates…

Since a stated goal in the By-Laws of many clubs is ‘the enjoyment of our cars’, and since ours are sports cars, competitive driving events find favor with most groups. One type of event that is popular with drivers and organizers alike is the ‘Funkhana’. These do not require much in the way of facilities nor equipment, and they can be tailored to the tastes of your group. Hard-charging, would-be racers can test their car handling skill and reflexes in the ‘dual’ event, while the competitive urges of the more sedate club members are challenged by the ‘Novelty Funkhana’. Let’s take a look at both types:

The ‘DUAL FUNKHANA’ requires the use of a large parking lot which can be divided into two equal areas. Local schools, businesses or shopping centers can usually be persuaded to allow your club to stage the event. The needed equipment is limited to some fifty or so rubber pylons, two stopwatches, some large poster board on which to display the results, and a bag of flour to mark lines. Two identical courses are laid out one in each half of the parking lot. Two cars are started simultaneously and they each perform the test as quickly as possible. The starter starts both watches as he gives the ‘go’ signal and records each car’s time. The fun of this event comes from not only competing against the clock and the course but from seeing how you are doing against the car on the other side. This often leads to silly mistakes being made, as you try to hurry to beat the other car! This element can be encouraged if you set a free-form test where you require that a certain number of maneuvers be performed but you do not specify the order in which they must be done. For example, ‘enter each of five garages both forward and reverse in any order, then stop astride the finish line’. A couple of well-placed marshals are usually needed to ensure the course is completed correctly and to record penalties for failing to fully enter a garage or for hitting a pylon. When setting the penalties, make sure that the penalty points exceed the time saved by incurring the penalty. Some canny competitors deliberately incur penalties to get a low time! The total event might encompass five different layouts, with consecutive runs on each side for each driver. Penalties of 1 point per second, five points per pylon moved or touched, ten for not entering a garage fully (all four wheels between the pylons), five for not stopping astride the finish line are typical. A competitor who fails to follow at least the prescribed route (it’s OK to realize you’re wrong and re-start where you went wrong) would get a time equal to the worst of any other competitor on that test. Each test should have a ‘bogey’ (ie the organizer would drive it) time of about 50 seconds. Classes can be set based on types of cars entered, and it’s always flattering to someone to offer an ‘F.T.D.’ award for the best score of the day.

Here are a couple of fun layouts, variations of which can easily be worked out. Remember only that you should allow plenty of stopping room (and no spectators!) at the end of a fast stretch and don’t make the turns so tight that lots of ‘backing and filling’ are needed. It’s a good idea, too, for the organizer to do a demonstration run of each test and to post the route on a large poster near the start.

The ‘NOVELTY FUNKHANA’ also requires a parking lot although a much smaller space can be used. Added equipment will be tennis balls, water balloons, paper cups, paper sacks, or what have you. This event also requires that a passenger be carried, to help get around the course. The range of tests is limited only by the organizer’s imagination but again, tests should be able to be completed in not more than a couple of minutes, and penalties should be carefully calculated so as to prevent deliberate screwing-up on the tests to get a low time. Here are a couple of ideas for novelty events: 1. Driver starts event out of car, key in hand, blindfold on (papersack on head). Navigator is in the car. At ‘Go’, navigator directs driver to car (may not help!); Driver starts car, drives forward (still blindfolded) following directions through a 3-pylon slalom, into a garage. Blindfold off, reverse into another garage where navigator has to throw three balls into a bucket. Then forward to another garage. Driver exits car, picks up three water balloons. Reverse through another slalom, navigator placing one balloon on each pylon. Then forward to finish line. 2. Start facing a layout of seven randomly placed pylons, each with a white, tennis ball on top. Crew have seven yellow balls, must replace white with yellow in any order, then stop astride finish line.

These should give you the idea! As you become more experienced and get to know your club members better, you can tailor the events to their likes and dislikes, adding more garages, pylons, water obstacles, balloons to burst with pointed sticks, etc. The object is fun, at the same time offering a chance for the skillful crew to score a low time.

Two last notes: Liability Insurance is usually required by the parking lot owner. On an event-by-event basis, this is usually not expensive if your carrier is given a clear outline of the nature of the event and the assurance that there will be no high speeds, wheel-to-wheel competition, or alcohol consumption by the drivers allowed. If your local carrier does not have an acceptable program, try J.C Taylor, this is something they offer to clubs everywhere. Fund Raising is also a possibility. You may want to charge your members an entry fee to cover the costs of the trophies, and you could consider running a promotional-type event where participation by other car owners is encouraged.

Funkhanas require a minimum of planning and provide a great deal of safe enjoyment when set up sensibly. They are a great way to enjoy your sports cars and get all your club members active. You’ll be surprised who puts up the good times, too!